Tag Archives: change

Affirmation #1: The Happiness Factor

(#1 in an 11 part series of posts about change, perseverance, and being a better you. Though personal to help myself, I’m posting these here in hopes I can help others who are struggling and wanting to make a change)

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Happiness. Depression. The infinitely-lasting struggle between the yellow ball of sunshine jumping around and the little blue sweetheart that can’t help but grab your heart and twist hard.

It happens to all of us. Yes, every single one of us. Even you, Mr. Johnny Positivity, over in the corner. We’ve all struggled with this before, even if you don’t want to admit it. We lose trust in others. We get separated long distances from friends, maybe in completely different time zones. We mess up a project with only a limited time to fix it.

Worst of all…

We’ve doubted ourselves.

You don’t have to say it out loud if you don’t want to. Just think about it for a second or two. Think of a particular moment in your life where something went wrong. How did you feel? Angry? Upset? Scared, maybe?

Now, think forward a little bit until where you fixed it. You remember that moment? Great!

Wait, some of you don’t? How could you not remember feeling excited and energized once again, ready to take on the world in a giant mecha-robot suit, taking down giant aliens with advanced technology, while you rescue people running in fear of their own doubts and-

Well, you get the idea.

But why? Why wouldn’t you remember? That moment that caused so much pain, so much doubt, so much negativity; how could you forget when it changed?

Think a little harder. DID you change it? Did you actually work hard and go the extra mile to fix that time of despair and worry? Or did you just let it get pushed to the wayside, only to be remembered years later and get depressed that you never made it better?

That’s the key to happiness. It’s just not drinking a margarita poolside at a beachside resort. It’s what led up to it. How did you get to that point? How did you end up in a lounge chair on white sand catching some rays while listening to the sound of the-

Gah, getting lengthy again.

Let’s get back on track. How were you able to relax like that? You would probably have had to rack up vacation time from work, pay for travel expenses – hotel, airfare, food, gas, etc –  take time to pack everything, and then deal with the crying baby three rows behind you on the airplane.

You ENDURED. You imagined sitting on that beach, and now you get to, because you worked for it. When you saw that flier for a five-day, four-night stay in Hawaii, you wanted it badly. It ate at you on and off. You normally come home exhausted from working 8-10 hour shifts, sometimes have to cook dinner for yourself or your family. You look at your wallet to find little fruit flies flying out and nothing more. You look at your body, and want to look good in a bikini/trunks, but it seems too hard.

You wanted that trip. Every day that passed, you worked towards it. Taking on extra hours at work. Running two miles at the crack of dawn before the sun even rises. Resort to small, healthy lunches and easy-to-prepare dinners (such as the glorious invention of the microwave). You turn away from that shirt or purse or POP! Figure you’ve wanted, in order to save money.

This makes things more difficult to live by. You start feeling disheartened, worried, doubtful, that this could ever pan out.

And then…

You look at your bank account.

You look at your reflection.

You look at those boarding passes you are handing to the flight attendant that say  “Flight #XXXX to Hawaii”.

And you smile.

That’s the happiness factor.

You wanted it, you WORKED FOR IT, and you got it. Happiness isn’t free. Either you or somebody else had to work hard to make it happen. Every road to happiness is a rough one. There will always be obstacles, hurdles, hills, and barricades in your path.

Just keep pushing onward.

Only YOU can do that.

It’s YOUR happiness.

Work for it.

 

Social Media From a Dummy

(This is in honor of the release of Social Media For Writers, a self-help book by Tee Morris and Pip Ballantine, now available on Amazon (click title above for hyperlink)(cover to the left)

Social Media hurts my head. Most of the functions are easy, and, if you don’t understand them, a plethora of resources are at your fingertips. Easy enough, right?

For me?

No.

It’s not due to the difficulty level; I understand how most work just fine. It’s on a more personal level. I’m the type of person who cares too much about what people think of me. When contemplating a response, if there is even the slightest chance someone might not like it, I usually don’t do it. It’s because of this that I seem antisocial or shy most of the time. I spend too much time debating on the perfect response, only for everybody to have moved on to something else.

I need to change that.

Just because I may seem weird, off, or offensive during one second doesn’t mean the seconds after will remain the same. Now, that doesn’t mean blurting out the first thing that comes to mind. Experience has proven to a multitude of people that that strategy fails quite frequently. But, the truth it, I shouldn’t be afraid to be myself.

As of today, I am going to make an effort to put myself out there more. This includes social media. I’ve had a Twitter account for a while, but rarely tweeted. I’ve had this blog/website for two years, and rarely posted. My LinkedIn hasn’t been touched in almost a year, while my Tumblr hasn’t been used in so long that I can’t even remember what my username is. (Note: Tumblr is one of the few that confuse me.) And, while my personal Facebook thrives, my author page has sat on lockdown for months.

NO MORE!!!

I will make my author page on Facebook live sometime tonight. This blog post marks the second in 24 hours. Twitter will be picking up speed in the next week or two (you know, hopefully). LinkedIn and Tumblr will probably stay static for a few more months until I get the hang of this whole “Be-Yourself” strategy.

Below are the links and details to my various social media accounts. I am including this website, just in case someone can’t read the URL box above.

***FYI- BIG NEWS: COMING SOON***

Website/Blog: http://terraravikos.com

Twitter/Periscope: @discoverywritin

FB Author Page

Email: terraravikos@gmail.com

E-Newsletter Sign-Up Form

I am also looking for people that might want to host me on their own blogs sometime in the December/January time frame, after I’ve announced my “Big News”. If you might be interested, shoot me an email or contact me through my FB page or Twitter handle.

Until later, Keep Faith, everyone!

Optimistic Heart

131007-093034I’ve been thinking about lots of stuff lately. Between work picking up pace, my friends and sister getting ready to graduate, and a death in the extended family, I’ve decided to reevaluate my life.

My life as a new author has been rough. I’ve been monitoring my sales page, which has been very depressing for the past few months. It made me wonder if I made a bad decision in self-publishing this novel. I’ve also thought about sending copies to review bloggers, but my mind does something to me every time I debate about an action.

Imagining the Worst Case Scenario.

I read some of these bloggers’ submission details, and when it says they post their reviews everywhere, both positive and negative ones, all I can think is, “What if it’s negative? What if my writing isn’t as decent as I had hoped? What if I get a bad review, and that scares others from even giving my novel a chance? That could ruin my shot at getting bigger…”

I have this OCD trait where I want everybody to like me. It doesn’t matter if I see or talk to someone for a few seconds in my entire life; I want that person to like me for those few seconds. It’s become such a paralyzing problem, because then I second-guess my thoughts. I walk on eggshells, trying to ensure that each person I meet or interact with doesn’t have negative thoughts about me and my behaviors and mental/emotional state.

TheProtektorsReality_400x640_115dpiThe thing I’ve come to realize recently, is that you can’t please everyone. You will always have haters, especially if you put your work out for the world to see. It comes with the job, and it’s something I’ve struggled with since Day 1.

I need to refocus on my dream, what I want, and how to get there, and not focus on the negativity that my mind creates for me. Being a pessimist has always come easy, the true challenge is getting past that. Despite the scenarios my imagination creates to scare me, I have always been optimistic about my dreams. I have always hoped to be partially-successful as an author. I always hoped I would sell tons of copies of my books, to prove to myself that I’m a good writer and that others enjoy the stories I have created.

The following lyrics are from a song that was released only a few days ago, by an AMAZING Youtuber named Tyler Ward. It’s an original song he wrote (and he had another video showing him going through the songwriting process for this very song), and it was perfect for what I had been thinking about for the week prior.

“So I’ll blame it on my Optimistic Heart,

At least I’ll have stories for my scars,

American Dream my life away,

When all of my dreams cry, “MAYDAY, MAYDAY!”,

I may lose my heart,

But one day I’ll be a star.”

So, for the others of you out there that have regret your decisions or lose faith in your dreams, “Try not to care what others think,” and have an Optimistic heart. Just keep trying. You’ll get there someday.

Good luck, Dreamers. “One day, [you’ll] be a star.”